In 1995, two ladies named Sherrie Schneider and Ellen Fein launched a book containing what they believed to be “35 fool-proof rules” for dating a man and getting him to tie the knot. The book became a bestseller and a lot of famous names promoted it, including Oprah.
The thing about the book is that it is packed with outdated gender stereotypes, especially for Ukrainian brides. Some people even label it “anti-feminist”. Lately, the publisher has released an updated version of the book, and we will see below if the rules in it have gotten any better!
The Rules and Its Problematic Rules
It is somewhat funny that despite the fact that The Rules was written by two women, the criticism found in the book is mostly directed toward women as well, including Ukraine women. Below are some examples of them, and the better way to see them.
Let Your Fear of Being Alone Forever Motivate You to Get Out There
Well, first off, it is probably not the best idea for a Ukraine beautiful woman to approach her dating life from a place of fear. Dating, for anyone, should come from a place of joy, shouldn’t it? Yes, it doesn’t always go as easy as that, but that’s the ideal thing, isn’t it?
Will you be happy if you meet a potential partner who is merely attracted to you because they are scared that they will be alone forever? Or do you prefer to come across a person who is out there because they believe that they will find someone they can spend a good time with?
In the dating world, the main goal is to become the most attractive version of yourself. If you force yourself to become an online dating Ukraine member just because you are afraid of loneliness, things will probably will never work the way you want them to.
Men and Women Communicate Differently
The book tells Ukrainian beauties that men don’t have the same intense need for communication. While it might be true in some cases, it is actually still a very generalized and stereotyped statement. Every person, regardless of gender, has the need to communicate.
The authors of the book probably wanted to say that males don’t talk as much as their female counterparts, but, still, it does not necessarily mean that they don’t have that need to communicate with others. They still want to be seen and understood.
What the authors probably did not understand is that men don’t always use talking to communicate. Instead, men can build bonds with others by simply playing video games or sitting in silence in the same place for a brief time.
Don’t Let The Other Person See Your Vulnerable Part
The same book also tells you that you should never let Ukrainian brides know about your lower self, even when you are on your worst days. This, without a doubt, is a very sad and unrealistic statement. It is just hard to disagree more on this!
In a healthy and solid relationship, each party should be a supportive person who is there for their partner, no matter what the situation is. If you don’t think that this is true, you can ask yourself how would you feel if your partner left you in a difficult situation.
On top of that, doesn’t it feel exhausting to constantly hide your true feelings and needs from your partner? Try to understand that showing these things to your partner doesn’t automatically imply that you are a needy and selfish person.
Play Hard to Get
Playing hard to get is one of the many things that lead to men asking “Can you trust a Ukrainian woman?”. The book literally tells women that men only go for the things they can’t have and, for this reason, women need to show very little interest in their date.
Honestly speaking, this is one of the worst advice you can get, particularly in today’s modern world of Ukraina dating. If you open a new tab in your browser and search for the data on this subject, you will immediately see that the above statement is completely not true.
What is true is that men will always go for a woman who reciprocates their interest. So, the next time you go to your Ukraine cupid login page, remember that life is too short to play unimportant games, and, if you have an interest in a person, let them know!
The Takeaway
There is no denying that Schneider and Fein’s book was a big success. Nonetheless, we can’t also ignore the fact that many of the rules stated in the book are no longer relevant with dating Ukrainian brides.
You don’t have to read every section in the book to see that the rules are very heteronormative. Honestly speaking, it even seems like the book, whether it is the original or the newer version, is actually trying to put men and women in two opposing teams.
If you believe that you need books like The Rules to successfully nail a Ukrainian date, then you have to rethink your decision. Forget any dating rule you learned before and, instead, teach yourself to enjoy the journey of figuring out the story of the person in front of you!